Inner Alchemy

We do not see things as they are; we see things as we are. ~ The Talmud

There are many experiences, thoughts and feelings that are common to all people. Some of these are discussed openly and frequently. We might encounter statements and discussions about them online, on social media, through great works of art, in writing, in music, in poetry and in our own journals! Some of these include subjects such as love, loss, longing, hope, and fear.

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When we’re alone and when there are few distractions, we tend to think about such things.

Yet, during such quiet moments, when no one else is near, sometimes we have a thought that flits at the very edge of our mind. The thought contains the idea that we can do something we haven’t yet done; that we have a capability as yet unexpressed; that we have the ability to create or to do something about which no one else knows. As far as we are aware, no one else knows of this thing. Only we know. We have carried it within, inside, for a long time. Since when? How long? We cannot recall. Has it always been there, hovering at the edge of who we are? It may be that we, ourselves, have only become aware of it, recently. However, even though our own awareness of this may be rather recent, the deepest part of us knows that it has always been there, within.

What is it? It is a part of us. Hovering at the edge of our minds, it is neither fleeting nor temporal. No, it is ingrained in the fabric of our eternal nature, like the grains found in the trunk of a tree.

Perhaps, this aspect or characteristic or ability doesn’t mesh with the outward identity we’ve consciously woven. Perhaps, it doesn’t mesh with the way we believe others see us or the ways in which we want others to see us. We may be afraid that this quality buried deep within us is “bad,” or “wrong.” We may fear it. For, to acknowledge this capability within will require an act of courage. It requires that, instead of allowing it to remain at the periphery of our thoughts or sequestered in a dark corner of ourselves, we encounter it directly. It requires that we turn our inner gaze directly upon it, that we listen with our whole heart, and that we acknowledge it fully. It may beckon us to become someone we’ve not yet been. It may be that we will express ourselves and behave in ways we’ve not done hitherto.

Let’s courageously encounter ourselves. While encountering and accepting ourselves - meaning, specifically, the dark parts of ourselves that often include our desires, our gifts and our abilities - let’s seek inner wisdom. For how much better it is, “... to get wisdom than gold. To get understanding is to be chosen rather than silver.” (Prov 16:16)

After making this choice, then, what?

Who knows? We can begin by simply embracing and accepting these shadowy portions of ourselves. This initial meeting of each one of us and aspects of ourself is vital. This acknowledgement of an aspect of ourself by ourself is important. Beyond this, a reunion of self with self is important. It’s important, not only for each of us as an individual, but for all of us collectively. For as each of us becomes whole as an individual, society becomes whole.

As C. G. Jung said:

If you imagine someone who is brave enough to withdraw all his projections, then you get an individual who is conscious of a pretty thick shadow. Such a man has saddled himself with new problems and conflicts. He has become a serious problem to himself, as he is now unable to say that they do this or that, they are wrong, and they must be fought against... Such a man knows that whatever is wrong in the world is in himself, and if he only learns to deal with his own shadow he has done something real for the world. He has succeeded in shouldering at least an infinitesimal part of the gigantic, unsolved social problems of the day.

From this point on, we can simply place one foot before the next, taking just one step at a time. Chances are, this will involve some kind of struggle. But, don’t our attempts to ignore obscure inner parts of ourselves involve struggle? Doesn’t fearfully trying to run from ourselves involve struggle?

A crystal hidden within the earth contains all its facets. However, while buried, no one can see them. Those facets have not yet reflected the light of day. When it’s unearthed, when the soil and dust are brushed from the crystal, only then do we begin to see its angles and dimensions. Upon further cutting, polishing and development, we’re able to appreciate its properties, its beauties, and even to derive benefits from it.

The very circumstances or events in our lives that hurt us, that cause us pain, that seem to damage us, may be transformed to benefit us. What we consider dark or unacceptable about ourselves are the very things that can be alchemized into qualities that become beautiful, that enable us to mature, to be more compassionate, to be more understanding and to love those around us. Certainly, simply by recognizing and owning these “dark” characteristics, we’ll cease to project them onto others.

Our time here is so short. Let’s learn to “number our days and apply our hearts to this inner wisdom.”*

The vicissitudes and circumstances of life can mold us. The challenges of life cleave facets into who we are. With our choices, we can allow ourselves to be cut, faceted and polished. We may become jewels, shining within and without for ourselves and for the benefit of those around us.

Societies are made of many individuals. If we want to our societies to move forward, if we want our societies to change, then each of us must change individually. We cannot hope to live in a better world until we - each of us - is more whole. Now, today, our world is in need of whole individuals who love and accept themselves and who, in turn, are able to love others.

Let’s go within. Let’s sit with ourselves. Let’s shine the light of self-reflection within. Let’s examine aspects of ourselves that we’ve consciously or unconsciously buried. Let’s suspend harsh judgement. Let’s accept ourselves. Let’s go even further. Let’s love ourselves. Let’s love our own souls.** As we do so, we can incorporate seemingly dark and disparate aspects of ourselves into our concept of who we are. As Charlotte Bronte said so succinctly, “The shadows are as important as the light.”

Ironically, the qualities and characteristics from which we run and hide - once made conscious - are often the greatest treasures within us.

How can we love another, if we don’t first love ourselves?***

Until next time,

K. M. Anderson

PhD, Metaphysics

PhD, Spiritual Counseling

Whisperia

P. S. If you’d like to read more Whisperia articles in this vein, please click on the links below for, “Man in the Mirror, and “Hidden Light, Shining Darkness.”

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NOTES

* So teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom. (Psalm 90:12)

** Whoever gets wisdom loves his own soul; he who keeps understanding will discover good. (Proverbs 19:8)

*** Love thy neighbor as thyself. (Mark 12:31) italics mine